Q&A with Sandy Sasso
On the 10th anniversary of the classic God's Paintbrush, Sandy Sasso reflects on lessons learned.
Helping children of all faiths develop the spiritual aspect of their lives-Sandy Eisenberg Sasso has done it by authoring ten books in the last decade. Known by religious educators, parents, and booksellers for her ability to foster the spirituality of children, Sasso's books have received numerous awards and are endorsed by Protestant, Catholic, and Jewish religious leaders. Several have been translated into Spanish, German, Italian, and Hebrew.
Sasso's breakthrough book, God's Paintbrush, has over 100,000 copies in print; she has lectured worldwide about children's spirituality. As God's Paintbrush: Special 10th Anniversary Edition (which includes a special note to parents) is released, Sasso discusses the complexity-and joy-that comes with helping children develop their spiritual selves.
Q: ARE CHILDREN INHERENTLY SPIRITUAL?
A: Like adults, children are spiritual seekers; they come to us with an innate spirituality. What they don't have is the language to express it. Religious education for children, including spiritual writing, should give them the language, the tools they need to reflect and explore their spiritual experiences. Spiritual experience is a given; spiritual awareness must be learned or it will remain dormant for a lifetime.
Q: WHY ARE ADULTS RELUCTANT TO TALK WITH CHILDREN ABOUT SPIRITUALITY?
A: We tend to think young children aren't old enough for conversations about religion, that they aren't able to engage in a spiritual life, aren't ready to deal with the big questions of life's meaning and purpose. Often, this is because we have lost faith ourselves and don't know where to find it. We don't know what to believe in anymore, so what can we possibly tell our children? The truth is that from the time they are born, our children have the gift of faith-a soul-and if we take their hand on the journey we just might find our own faith again.
Q: TRADITIONALLY, WHAT HAS BEEN THE ROLE OF RELIGIOUS EDUCATION?
A: Very often religious education has focused on teaching information, the mastery of a body of knowledge. But our children are more than minds-they each have a soul. Research in children's spirituality has found the place children are least likely to feel comfortable exploring spirituality is in religious institutions. We have to help them. We have to change this.
Q: WHAT LANGUAGE DOES ONE USE WHEN TALKING TO CHILDREN ABOUT RELIGIOUS CONCEPTS? THEOLOGY CAN GET BOGGED DOWN IN COMPLEX IDEAS AND DIFFICULT WORDS.
A: When talking to our children about God, we do not need to simplify the concept, only the language. When I write for children about the spiritual, I strive for a language that is clear, rich in metaphor and symbol, concrete and with personal relevance to them, and open to a continuing conversation.
Q: DO CHILDREN WRESTLE WITH DEFINING GOD?
A: Some of the children I have encountered were being taught there was a right way to call God and a wrong way. They were right and everyone else was wrong. I was struck by the Jewish teaching that God is like a mirror and everyone who looks into it sees a different face. It is what inspired me to write a story I called In God's Name. Before I read In God's Name to children I ask them what their favorite name for God is. They choose the names they have been taught by their parents or in their religious communities. Often they say Father, Adonai, Hashem. Then I read In God's Name. Afterwards, I ask again what is their favorite name for God. Most frequently they say Mother, Friend. At Yom Kippur Family Service one year I read In God's Name to my congregation. A child whose mother had been battling breast cancer since he was one year old said, "My favorite name for God is 'Healer.'" Once they are given permission to speak what they feel, children will name God out of their experience, their place.
Q: DON'T RELIGION AND SPIRITUALITY FORM THE BASIS OF RIGHT AND WRONG, GOOD AND BAD?
A: When we say the good are rewarded and the bad are punished, our children often initially understand that having a "good life" is a sign of God's blessing and having a "bad life" is a sign of God's disapproval. What then do we say to the child whose family does good, but still suffers from poverty, illness, misfortune? What do we say when our children grow up and relinquish responsibility for helping others because they blame others for their own misfortune? When we say that our faith is superior to others, that it is the only right way to salvation, our children internalize that the beliefs of others are wrong.
Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN RELIGION AND SPIRITUALITY?
A: Spirituality is a mode of living in the awareness of the divine presence, the sacred. It is the recognition of the transcendent, a sense of life's interconnectedness. The spiritual life is rooted in experience, encounters with the self, others, and the world. Religion acts as the container for the life of the spirit. It is the gravity that anchors the spirit to earth, translating the vision of the soul into the responsibility of the individual and the mandate of the community. In the best of all possible worlds, spirituality and religion are partners. The soul's most profound experiences with a presence greater than the self are given form and articulation through liturgy, ritual, and moral law. Religious forms, in turn, remain constantly open to the renewal of sacred moments.
Q: FOR TEN YEARS, PARENTS, EDUCATORS AND OTHER ADULTS HAVE USED YOUR BOOK GOD'S PAINTBRUSH TO OPEN UP CONVERSATIONS WITH CHILDREN ABOUT GOD AND SPIRITUALITY. HOW DOES THIS WORK?
A: Each of the vignettes in the book end with a question. The first publisher I approached said, "We like the book but there's just one thing-take out the questions." "Why?" I asked. "Parents are afraid of the conversation. They won't buy the book," he assured me. Against better judgment I took out the questions. He still didn't publish the book. I sent the book to Jewish Lights without the questions. Its publisher said, "We love the book. There is just one thing-could you put in questions?" I knew I had found the right publisher. As adults we feel we need to have all the answers, to be in control, to find a solution to every problem. But children realize that they can't control everything and that the world is filled with mystery. Children aren't afraid of questions without answers until we make them afraid. Books of faith ought to be filled more with awe than answers. Problems arise when we give the impression that there is one answer, we have it, and everyone else is wrong.
Q: HOW DO YOU SEE YOUR ROLE IN HELPING CHILDREN DEVELOP THEIR SPIRITUALITY? ARE YOU A RABBI, AN EDUCATOR, A NURTURER? ARE YOU A STORYTELLER?
A: I am all of these things, and so is any adult who wants to help a child become a spiritual person (okay, not everyone's a rabbi). I write stories for children about faith because I believe the native language for children is story. Stories help children grapple with deep spiritual matters. When they enter the story and talk to us about what part of the story is about them we catch a glimpse of their souls.
Q: MANY PEOPLE CONSIDER YOU THE PREMIER EXPERT ON CHILDREN'S SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT? DO YOU?
A: I am certainly not the expert on the spirituality of the children. YOU are, if your heart is open to remembering your own earliest encounters with the God who plays hide and seek with us. If you are open to listening to that presence in your own past, then you can also listen for it in the precious lives in your care. Think back to your own childhood. Capture in your mind a time when you came close to the mystery of the presence of God. Help children find that time in their own lives and remember it.
Q: WHAT ARE SOME POINTERS YOU CAN GIVE THAT WILL HELP ADULTS WHO WANT TO HELP CHILDREN GROW SPIRITUALLY?
A:
Encouraging the religious imagination in children requires us to nurture it in ourselves. Spend time reading and learning about your religious tradition, about faith. Live your faith. Talking about God makes more sense when people also engage in living God. Let your children join you in expressions of care, gratitude, and hospitality.
Children want to know what you think, not what some "expert" thinks. Don't be afraid of the conversation.
Create an everyday spiritual world-where symbols, rituals, objects are as familiar as Happy Meals and teddy bears, where religious personalities and biblical characters are as commonplace as Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck.
Don't preach! Tell stories. Allow children to act out the story and to retell it in their own words. Create an environment where children get to tell their stories. Don't tell them what the story means-let them develop their own relationship for the narrative and tell you what it means to them. Let them find their place in the story, the place it connects to their lives.
Belong to a community where people live the stories of faith. Children need coaches not just for soccer; they need spiritual mentors for life.
Don't say what you later have to correct. Don't talk down to children. They are deep theologians. The theology of the books you read to children should also be satisfying to you as adults.
Let them know you approve their doubts, questions, challenges. Encourage searching.
Make time for prayer, for silence. Teachers ask 400 questions per day. They answer 80 percent of them. We abhor a vacuum; whenever there is a silence we rush to fill it up. At quiet times, children give us a glimpse of something precious, eternal: their souls. They need intentional quiet to remain in touch with their spirit.
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso, award-winning author of inspiring books for children of all faiths and backgrounds, is a parent, spiritual leader, and storyteller appreciated in many countries. There are over 300,000 copies of her books in print in English, German, Spanish, Italian, and Hebrew. The second woman to be ordained as a rabbi (1974) and the first rabbi to become a mother, she and her husband, Dennis, were the first rabbinical couple to jointly lead a congregation-Beth-El Zedeck in Indianapolis. They have two children, David and Debora. Sasso, who holds a doctorate in ministry, is active in the interfaith community, and has written and lectured on the renewal of spirituality, women and religion, and the discovery of the religious imagination in children of all faiths.
Reviews
Adam and Eve's First Sunset: God's New Day
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Joani Keller Rothenberg
What did Adam and Eve think when they saw the sun going down for the first time? Award winning author Sasso, who is also a Rabbi and mother, gives imaginative answers to this question. As the sun sinks further and further, Adam offers to help hold up the sun and Eve offers to sing. They hope to encourage the sun to keep shining. As the sun continues to sink, they begin to blame each other. In fear for their world, they turn to God and learn to make fire. Although fearing the worst, they finally sleep. The sun returns. The rooster crows. Adam and Eve wake up. With relief they give thanks and bless the new day. Their fear of the unknown reverts to trust. The vibrant pictures of the sun in a jungle background, carry out the underlying humor of the story. The spare text rests on every well-honed sentence. This tale of wisdom will be enjoyed by parents and children of every denomination. 2003, Jewish Lights Publishing, $17.95. Ages 4 to 8. Reviewer: Carlee Hallman (Children's Literature)
ISBN: 1-58023-177-2
But God Remembered: Stories of Women from Creation to the Promised Land
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Bethanne Andersen
But God Remembered is wonderful, but it isn't long enough! The author and illustrator have created a book about women in the Bible from Creation to the Promised Land. This is a book of tales dealing with Biblical women whom almost no one remembers ( Lilith, Serach, Bityah (sometimes spelled Batyah), and the Daughters of Z. They all did things that changed their worlds, and their deeds should be celebrated. Although one common view of Lilith, the first woman, portrays her as a demon, Sasso has her as a guardian of the night, the Hebrew "layla." Serach is Jacob's granddaughter, who can tell him of Joseph's being found when his sons are afraid to. Bityah is the name given by God to Pharaoh's daughter, who remains with her father when Moses leaves for the Promised Land. And the Daughters of Z. have no brother to inherit their father's land. They appeal to Moses for an exemption from the traditional "males only" law. These are wonderful, thought-provoking stories from a master storyteller. 1995, Jewish Lights, $16.95. Ages 6 up. Reviewer: Judy Silverman (Children's Literature)
Best Books: Children's Catalog, Eighteenth Edition, 2001; H.W. Wilson; United States Editors' Choice: Books for Youth, 1995; American Library Association-Booklist; United States Not Just for Children Anymore!, 1999; Children's Book Council; United States
ISBN: 1-879045-43-5
For Heaven's Sake
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Kathryn Kunz Finney
Isaiah heard "for heaven's sake" often. As a matter of fact, people mention heaven a great many times, but no one could explain it to Isaiah. His father seemed to think that heaven described the brownies he made, the mail lady thought it was a place where she did not have to carry heavy loads, and his sister was not even sure that it exists. But Isaiah was told that when his grandfather died he had gone to heaven to be with God. Isaiah is determined to find out about heaven! Finally he visits his grandmother and explains what he is seeking. "That's a very fine thing to do...Would you mind if we looked together?" They go to the library, a soup kitchen and to the choir teacher. Although Isaiah enjoyed spending his day with grandma, he did not find heaven. His grandmother then tells him how to find heaven, which is "often in places we are least likely to look." The heart-warming story is accompanied by lovely paintings, and is one to be shared and discussed with children. 1999, Jewish Lights Publishing, $16.95. Ages 4 to 8. Reviewer: Laura Hummel (Children's Literature)
Some things just can't be explained straight out, like where and what was the heaven people kept talking about? "For heaven's sake, Isaiah," people would say to him; and heaven was where they said his grandpa went after he died. But where and what was it? Isaiah and his grandma keep each other company through a long day, which raises more questions than it answers, until a glimmer of the paradox shines through for him. Children will love this book for the way it echoes some of their deepest inquiries; adults will appreciate the openings it provides for talking about tough topics. 1999, Jewish Lights, $16.95. Ages 4 up. Reviewer: Judy Chernak (Children's Literature)
Best Books: Best of the Bunch, 1999; Association of Jewish Librarians; United States
ISBN: 1-58023-054-7
God in Between
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Sally Sweetland
Sasso creates a thought-provoking mythical tale of a town with no roads, whose houses have no windows, and whose residents lack the art of communication. As they stumble about aimlessly, unhappy with their lives but clueless as to how to change things, they happen upon the idea that perhaps there is a God, as someone has heard, and that God could help them change things. They decide to consult the man and the woman who live in the only houses with windows, and from here the inevitable searching through mountain, ocean and desert leads to the amazing thought that God must lie in the between--unseen but felt, if only people will seek. This book carries powerful endorsements from psychologists and religious leaders of Protestant, Catholic and Jewish faiths; yet I wonder if children can really grasp the concepts presented. Perhaps they will learn a good bit about cooperation and letting in light, though, and that's solid background for whatever faith concepts they may gather later on. Primitive brush-stroke illustrations show people of all cultures and colors to enhance the theme of universality. 1998, Jewish Lights, $16.95. Ages 6 to 10. Reviewer: Judy Chernak (Children's Literature)
ISBN: 1-879045-86-9
God Said Amen
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Avi Katz
In another of her inspired stories, Sasso unfolds a simple but grand fable about an irresistible force meeting an immovable object. The protagonists are the Grand Prince of the Kingdom of Midnight, "where the land was lush because water was plenty, but there was no oil to light the lamps" and the Grand Princess of the Kingdom of the Desert, "a land that sparkled with light, but there was no water to grow gardens." Each decides to follow the advice of a roving minstrel and travel to see the other's land. But each is too haughty to make the first move to solve their mutual problems, causing God to be sad. Eventually, both the Prince and the Princess turn, petrified feet first, into mountains, still unwilling to take the first step. Luckily, this is not where the story ends. The artist does a superb job with his alternating blue-cold and yellow-warm pages depicting the plenty and scarcity of the two countries until the colors merge happily at story's end. This one is a keeper for all ages, all peoples, and all religions. 2000, Jewish Lights, $16.95. Ages 4 to 10. Reviewer: Judy Chernak (Children's Literature)
ISBN: 1-580230-80-6
God's Paintbrush
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Annette Compton
A very special children's spiritual book for all faiths and backgrounds. Beautiful watercolor illustrations and thought-provoking text encourage children to enter into a relationship with God. A basic understanding of God is explored in helping children to better understand their world. Neither text nor illustrations are biased toward any one denomination or faith. A truly rare and wonderful addition to any family's library. 1992, Jewish Lights Publishing, $15.95. Ages 5 to 10. Reviewer: M. Thomas (Parent Council Volume 1)
ISBN: 1-879045-22-2
In God's Name
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Phoebe Stone
In God's Name is a beautiful text, charmingly illustrated. Stasso tells us how people use different names for God--names like Warrior, Healer, Comforter, Savior, Source of Life, Creator of Light. When each person is sure that his or her name is the only true name, no one listens, "not even God." In a joyous conclusion, Stasso explains that although people are of different faiths they all call upon the same God. Not to be read in only one session, this is for everyone. 1994, Jewish Lights, $16.95. Ages 4 to 8. Reviewer: Judy Silverman (Children's Literature)
Best Books: Best of the Bunch, 1994; Association of Jewish Librarians; United States
ISBN: 1-879045-26-5
Naamah, Noah's Wife
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Bethanne Andersen
It is a big year for new books about Noah, and here is a sturdy board book for the toddler set about his wife, Naamah. If you thought Noah did all the work for the ark, you were clearly mistaken, in the view of the author. True, he may have talked with God, heard his mission, built his ark, and sailed away on the floodwaters. But his wife, says Sasso, also received a mission from God. She was to "Gather the seeds of all the flowers and plants. Bring two of every kind on the ark." And so she did, creating a garden "away from all the animals" and boasting a sign reading, "These plants are not for food!!!" Naamah's mission continues after the rains subside and land appears so that she can plant all her seeds. The colorful pastel drawings are lighthearted and charming, with only one panel devoted to the grayness of the forty days of rain. Another triumph for author Sasso, who has a way with presenting spiritual ideas for young minds. 2002, SkyLight Paths, $7.95. Ages 3 mo. to 4. Reviewer: Judy Chernak (Children's Literature)
ISBN: 1-893361-56-X
A Prayer for the Earth: The Story of Naamah, Noah's Wife
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Bethanne Andersen
While Noah was busy collecting, and then later caring for, the animals on the ark, Naamah had also heard the voice of God. She was told to collect plants from every corner of the earth, and to care for them, and re-plant them after the waters receded. Even dandelions, which she thought of as weeds, have their place on the earth. This is a lovely story, beautifully told and illustrated. 1997, Jewish Lights, $16.95. Ages All.
Reviewer: Judy Silverman (Children's Literature)
We know much of Noah, but we learn of his wife Naamah in Sandy Eisenberg Sasso's lyrical Prayer for the Earth. Based on an ancient text, the story tells of how Naamah gathers seeds of the trees and and flowers to make a garden. Amid the ark's pandemonium, Naamah and her husband "breathe the sweet aroma of the flower" and are calmed by the quiet of her garden. Later when Naamah plants all she has gathered in the earth, God calls her "Mother of Seed" and she is happy with the beauty she has created. Illustrations by Bethanne Anderson are a vivid, dancing bouquet of color and emotion. 1996, Jewish Lights Publishing, $16.95. Ages 6 up. Reviewer: Susie Wilde (Children's Literature)
ISBN: 1-879045-60-5
What is God's Name?
Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Illustrated by Phoebe Stone
The animals and other living things were given names after God created the world but, according to Sasso, no one knew the name for God. Each created his or her name and unfortunately each felt that this name for God was the best. One day all of the people came together and realized that all the names were good and spontaneously they spoke the same name. That made God very happy. A real message of tolerance and acceptance--behaviors that should be the foundation of any religious beliefs. 1999, Skylight Paths, $7.95. Ages 1 to 5. Reviewer: Marilyn Courtot (Children's Literature)
ISBN: 1-893361-10-1
Added 2003
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