Bill Zimmerman's 13 Tips for Boys To Have A Better Life
In his new book of encouraging words for boys, 100 Things Guys Need to Know (Free Spirit Publishing) author Bill Zimmerman offers these tips to help boys make their way in the world.
1. Every boy needs to have some basic things he believes in, or his key operating principles. These can be things like believing in yourself, not giving up easily when problems occur, or treating others the way you want to be respected. These operating principles will keep you steady when life throws you some curves. They tell you what's really important to you and help ground you when you're not sure.
2. You're not alone. Look around you. No matter whether other boys are short or tall, athletic or brainy, funny or quiet, they all have thoughts and feelings just like you. They worry about the same kinds of things you do.
3. ou have more power than you think, and often that power comes in the form of helping others. This can be as simple as helping out a buddy with a problem and showing you support him. Your power is in what you decide to do for others and for yourself.
4. Stop worrying about whether you're “macho” or manly enough. The strongest guys are always the ones who think for themselves and treat everyone with respect. The only big muscle you really need is a good heart.
5. It's okay to make mistakes. That's the reason pencils have erasers: no one does everything right the first time every time. When you're learning something new, be patient with yourself. You'll come through if you keep working hard.
6. Ask for help when you have a problem. There's nothing wrong with admitting you don't have all the answers. Who does? Look around you: there must be someone who can help you; a parent, a relative, a teacher who cares about you or some other trusted adult you can talk with. No one will ever make fun of you for asking for help.
7. It's okay to cry. Don't bottle up your feelings all the time, it will only create too much pressure inside you. Crying is something all people do some times. It doesn't mean you're weak, it means you're human.
8. Try to imagine what it's like to walk in someone else's shoes for a while. Choose one person from your school, even someone you think you have nothing in common with. Picture what this person might be thinking about or wishing for. Maybe you share more with him or her than you realize. Just like you do, all people deserve respect.
9. Believe in yourself. Everyone will have bad days. And that's the time to try to remember the good things in your life and what you have accomplished. Keep a list of them in your backpack or wallet to refer to when things don't look bright. This will give you courage and perspective. Bad times don't last forever.
10. You're special. There never has been, and never will be, anyone on earth exactly like you. Just as no one else has your thumbprint, no one on the planet has your one-of-a-kind mind, personality or imagination. You bring something to the world that nobody else has. You're special.
11. Part of getting older is learning to make good decisions. This includes choosing who you want to spend time with. Don't give in to group pressure. Ask yourself: Do you want to have to act in certain ways to be accepted, such as putting down others, or not being yourself? Isn't it a lot more fun to hang out with friends who like the true you?
12. Be yourself. Maybe you're someone who likes to spend a lot of time hanging out with big groups, or maybe you're more quiet or shy and prefer spending a lot of time on your own. Figure out what works best for you and go with it. Be comfortable with who you are.
13. Be your own hero. Watching Spider-Man and other action heroes can be a rush. But the courage and bravery of these characters are something you can match. Think of all the problems you've fixed and overcome. Think of the friends and family members you have helped. All this took guts and determination. That shows you when tough times call, you have the skills and courage to take them on.
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Added 07/07/05
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